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The world needs love

Love, one pipecleaner heart at a time

The concept that “Belief in something doesn’t make that true” throws itself into sharp contrast for me this week. I held the belief that America would not elect a Klan-backed, lying, misogynistic, sex-offending bigot as president.

Civilisation very much feels like it’s turning itself inside out right now. I could take the focus that the world is going to hell in a hand basket, mutter to myself about it all being wrong and simply let it wash over me, but instead I choose to see this as the world having a healing crisis, where symptoms, such as bigotry, hatred, ignorance and even war get worse before healing ultimately happens. Taking this focus and meaning to the events means that I can take action. It means that I, and all the other people in the world that espouse love, equality and kindness are the cure.

I do not doubt that the vast majority of Americans are kind, they are known world over for their hospitality and generosity, so I’ve been reading frantically about why America might choose to elect Donald Trump, seeking understanding beyond the “news bubble” that I live in (mostly populated by “WTF?” type posts, but no real reasons) and come to understand that change and growth is something that deeply strikes against the belief system of the people that voted for Trump, and that the slogan “Make America Great Again” to them means harking back to a time where their known status (religion, skin colour, jobs, homes, family structures) in the world was certain. It means retaining a Status Quo that about half of the world is moving away from, dragging the other half (in some cases very) unwillingly behind it. And also, as the movement is due to various ideas working in opposing directions, it’s no wonder the world is so confused right now!

However, if you are here, you probably shared my now disproven belief, and are quite possibly feeling defeated. Right now, you might not have the strength for yet another fight, and that’s OK. Self Care is important. Do the self care that you need to get you ready to give the world the love it needs. Retreat, eat good food, watch Netflix, go for walks in the local park, love the people and pets around you and just be for a bit. The world will be here when you are ready to pick up again.

However, if you stay in your cave too long, this can be as detrimental as working from no resources, so, if you do find yourself feeling overwhelmed, as you know, I love using EFT as a pattern interrupter. I’ve used it successfully with clients to help them get to the roots of their issues as well as to enable their progress when they are stuck.

So when Brad Yates’ newsletter dropped this video into my inbox I felt that I needed to share his words and the accompanying video with you:
“I actually shot this video a few weeks ago – it wasn’t about the election, but about this feeling that many of us experience from time to time.  But it takes on a new timeliness now, as a lot of people are feeling this these days… totally understandable.  A large group of folks were going to feel this whichever way the election went.  Honor your feelings, and when you are ready to stand up, brush yourself off and get going again, I hope you will find this helpful.  We need you… :)”

NB: As I said before, if you have never viewed Brad’s Channel before, before you start tapping away, you must watch these two videos first – as Brad is very clear that you know what you are doing, and that you take full responsibility for your own well being.

There are of course other pattern interrupters and ways to enable progress, but this one is one of my favourite as it is so simple, and once you know how, you can do it autonomously either “free-form” or via one of the many many scripts on Youtube (in fact, some of the best results are when the words simply “fall out of your brain” rather than with scripts) and it gets fast results.

So, tell me how you are going to spread a little (or a lot of!) love to the world. Start small, create ripples! Leave me a comment below and then we can start working to connect your dots!

Catch you next time!

Image used LOVE by Lorie Shaull
Used Under Creative commons licence: Attribution 2.0 Generic (CC BY 2.0)

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August was a very weird time – an all too brief 4 day visit from one of my partners, two funerals, a wedding and the Nineworlds Geekfest conference sandwiched in between them – All very exhausting emotional things – followed by a period of “brain fuzz” from “doing all the stuff”, so not much room for the inspiration needed to write to take effect.

I’ve wanted to write my next post (“You can’t do it wrong“) for the last three weeks, but my brain simply didn’t want to give me “words” of any shape.  I did manage to journal a little bit about one of the funerals (to aid creating white space in my brain) but I know there is way more in there that needs to come out. When I’ve not been at work (doing “the minimum needed to get by and keep projects moving”), I’ve spent most of my time either sleeping, fussing over my orchids/watching YouTube videos on Orchid care and finishing up re-watching S7 of Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

Now, I could chose to beat myself up over this seeming “waste of time”, and a few years ago I very much would have done, feeling all the guilt around “doing nothing” and I would have tried to force “things to work”, which would inevitably lead to life not working at all and even more “things not happening” in life as I wallowed and flailed.

However, taking the Mindful view on things, I simply acknowledge that having had a very emotion filled and time sapping beginning to August,  I needed some time to reset. And my doing that self-care and taking that time to get back in the flow is not something that is “bad” or “wrong”, it is something that just “is”. And I have no need at all to feel bad about that at all.

Take my work here for instance. I dedicated myself to producing world-changing content once a week, and my lack of words to the world since the beginning of August could be seen as a massive failure. I could sit here in a puddle of self-recrimination and self-doubt, allow that negativity to enable me to listen to my amygdala and simply give up on my writing and myself  – because changing the world takes effort… and that equals resistance.

I do know that for the last week or so, where my brain has been up and firing again, that I have been very subject to resistance. I’ve been wallowing, “filling up my eyes” in a rather drastic way, doing anything to seemingly avoid writing or creativity (Although I have been spending lots of time with my Orchids!).

However, using that resistance as my compass, and knowing that my time-out allowed my brain to heal, enough is enough and it’s time to push on through! It’s time to give thanks and forgiveness in my life, open up to abundance and start shining again.

I’m hoping that I’ve given you reassurance and food for thought. Have you had a time where you felt that everything was just too much? How did you cope then? And are you now working Mindfully and with Gratitude to accept that sometimes life hands you a shit sandwich (to quote Marie Forleo!) and that you have to deal and move along. Leave me a comment below, and we can start working on connecting those dots.

Catch you shortly!

Image used “Intermission (5/7)” by jnyemb
Used Under Creative commons licence: Attribution 2.0 Generic (CC BY 2.0)

Pick a craft, any craft…

craft room

Oh my,  last weekend has been hectic, and not in a good way, my partner had a rather awful healthcare experience, mostly in terms of “lack of human touch” quality to the care given by some of the overstretched hospital staff rather that the actual health issue itself. As “Pick your craft/Find your Bliss” is exactly what I had written as last week’s article title, life provided me with the inspiration to write the article, even if the experience wasn’t actually that great in itself..

Hence I’m a week later than I wanted to be in getting a post on this this topic written and out to you all. However, as we sat on the ward, rather bored and awaiting the needed medication bag so escape could happen, both of us wished that we had our knitting with us to keep us occupied, rather than just an iPad to stream media on.

The stress of the tedious not knowing what was going on was rather high, and , any craft that was small enough to be portable would have been a good way to engage the limbic brain “in the now”, rather than allowing the Neocortex to loop around in “what if???” circles. This is because watching a TV show is simply a passive activity, rather than an engaging/active one.

I know that knitting isn’t everyone’s cup of tea, but I do advocate that everyone should have a craft; something creative that can be played in and around with, as often as possible. As well as knitting, I dye yarn and fibre, muck around with watercolour pens and Sharpie(TM) markers (drawing is very much not one of my skills, but I like the “art-sy doodles” I produce), coo and fuss over my orchids (because helping them grow them is definitely an art!) and write, both on my websites and in my journal.

As adults, we generally leave play behind us; it’s seen as childish, a waste of time and something that should no longer be required in the adult world of responsibilities. But this lack of joy through play and creativity is very harmful to us.

Engaging in these craft activities gives me “flow” (“flow” being what psychologist Mihály Csíkszentmihályi describes as “a state of concentration or complete absorption with the activity at hand and the situation … A state in which people are so involved in an activity that nothing else seems to matter.”) – moments of mindfulness where all my brain is doing only one thing, leaving me totally wrapped up in “the now” of the creative moment.

I know that finding flow and having my playful craft activities enhances my day-to-day hum drum. Since I’ve been crafting more, I’ve become generally happier, more able to concentrate, both at home and at work and I find it easier to resolve problems and issues because my attitude is more relaxed and playful about “things”.

So, I want to challenge you to find your bliss as well. What type of craft do you to already that you could find time to enjoy more? Or, is there a playful activity that you’d really like to try? Take action to find that bliss, and then leave me a comment below about it, so we can start working on connecting those dots.

Catch you next week!

Image used, Craft Room by chrissy.farnan
Used Under Creative commons licence: Attribution 2.0 Generic (CC BY 2.0)

“Creating” Money by scheduling it into reality

savings pots

I put creating in quotes in the title because the wealth you will create with the “scheduling creates reality” principle is actually money you already have and/or money that people and organisations give to you in “rewards” – this principle is  simply the organisation of that spare cash.

This effortless “wealth creation” is simply automated saving (a fantastic money tip I picked up from Kate Northrup in her book: Money, A Love Story )

Make specifically named savings accounts and schedule a small weekly/monthly automatic transfer that fits your budget.

I created two savings pots with named purposes (“Present Buying Fund” and “Dyeing Workshop Creation Fund”) on 26th February 2015, and set up an auto transfer of £7/week each on a Friday (£1/day). (If you are paid monthly, schedule a transfer of £30.42/month =£365.04/year))

£7/week fits my model as I “pay” myself a weekly disposable budget. And yes, I hold my “Money for life” in another savings account (interest!) and schedule the weekly transfer into my current account.

I also pop extra cash from the “reward” and “cashback” monies my bank gives me for being in credit/spending in certain shops, and if  Salary payday is a Friday, I zero my current account the evening before and tip the “left over cash” in there as well.

This “left over” money is usually under a fiver, money that would be easy to just fritter away, easy to unconsciously spend on “utter rubbish” just because it is there. I could do this zeroing every week, but I’m not that ruthless on myself (yet). It works out though, generally, my weekly left over is what pays my scheduled transfer!

I really really don’t notice any “lack” because of scheduling that tiny regular transfer. And simply because the pots exist, I don’t fritter my “reward” monies away on junk.

In the 2 months they’ve been open, they’ve built up £110124 between them!

As a bonus, I’ve also created a “no panic/stress zone” over the “where do I get the money to buy my partners a Birthday/Xmas/Anniversary/Valentine present?” issue. This in itself is a huge clarity win!

As this is working so well, I’ve made two new pots, as from next month I have “Extra Cash” coming from my mortgage renegotiation. A muck up with my pay means that I’ll also be getting a very small lump sum.

I’ve already set up a monthly “old to new Mortgage difference” transfer, and I’ve done another £1/day transfer that will also kick in after pay day. That one is towards having a month off the day-job! I’ve done all the hard work, and now its simply waiting for the money to arrive, so automatic scheduling can take care of the wealth creation for me, effortlessly!

So, have I inspired you? Take action today & open a savings pot and schedule a transfer today that will kick in next pay-day. Come back and leave me a comment below about what you are “scheduling to reality” around, then we can start working toward connecting those dots.

If it’s not scheduled, it’s not real.

GCal Schedule

When I was in my teens and early twenties, I never kept a diary/calendar and I remembered all the phone numbers that I needed (about 20 at that point in my life). I prided myself on remembering everything I needed rather than having to write it down. (I learned the periodic table, both order and atomic number/weights for instance)

Whilst my memory is still something I take a pride in, and I’m well known as having “the elephant brain” in my team (I remember everything I do generally, and when prompted, can easily recall detail level (or where to look to get it), I acknowledge that life back them was rather more simple in terms of happenings and events than it is now.

Ironically, but unsurprisingly, one thing I was never good at when I was younger was being on time or prepared for things. Although I knew where I was supposed to be, I never planned enough time to get everything done before arriving. I never honoured the space that appointments take, and I realise now that this is because I didn’t schedule anything.

I now live and die by my Google Calendar. It’s awash with colour-coded goodness and copious event notes. I now know where I need to be and when, what I need to do to prepare, I get it to send me text messages to prompt me and can therefore show up fully committed and raring to go!

For instance, I’m a B-School Alumni from 2011, but this is the first year I’ve done the entire course. Previously the time I needed to commit was just swamped in the tide of life & I faded out after the first week. So why success this year? Because I scheduled it! I carved out the time to do it in my GCal, told my partners that I was “DND”during this time and therefore I was fully engaged in the process.

Recently, I’ve also been popping in physical things that I want to achieve/own as well as the things I need to do/places I am planning to be at.

If it’s in my schedule, I will put time and effort into making it happen.
I’ve given my brain permission to act on an external ordered list, rather than juggle and procrastinate over an internal mess.

By reducing that internal mess, I gain clarity, and so actually have space to get other “to-do” tasks done along side my scheduled events! I’ve finally found a round tuit 😉

Also, by making space in my life for “a thing”, I tell my limbic brain and so the universe that I’m open to receiving said thing. Being open to receive means that either “the thing” will just turn up, or the means to obtain “the thing” will happen in my life.

So, have I inspired you? I know that I inspired myself and I’ll be carrying on in this theme next week; as I wrote this piece, another ‘blog post focusing specifically on Money Scheduling fell out of my brain and onto the page as well! *new post, cut-paste*

Meanwhile, take action today & get your schedule out of your head and either write it down or GCal it. Come back and leave me a comment below about what you are “scheduling to reality” around, then we can start working toward connecting those dots.

Catch you next week!